"Action News Alert!
Due to the energy crisis, Acme's new bio-nuclear gas wells have been popping up all over the country.
HEED POSTED WARNINGS!

Let's see.....Ut oh. Here it is. **Rottweiler: 18 month old female. Answers to the name #$%&!!! Spy stopit!
Inquiries not needed, just come and get the thing.**

At a campground in Albion, Pa this week, campers were reported to be held up in the port-a-potties for hours when an unnamed Rottweiler refused to share the two-ply.